Letters to Heaven: Lydia's baptism story & Happy Easter weekend

Lydia’s Baptism, Easter letters & Prayers

In so many ways I feel like my Mom sent Lydia to me. First, I conceived around Mother’s Day when I had barely even started to try; then my due was around my Mom’s birthday; and then finding out I was having a girl. She resembles her Nana so much, and Mommy :)

So, with the new Epiphany Star sculpture being dedicated and hung at St. Paul’s in memory of my Mom, this presented an opportunity to me. It sparked a beautiful idea to have Lydia baptized while Nana’s Star was still up for its first season. This particular year the epiphany season lasted 8 weeks, which is the longest it can ever last and does not happen too often, at least not that I’m aware of. Lydia would still be very young -most likely only 4-6 weeks old, and it would be during the winter, so that was a little concern. But, I just had to try, right!? God is always in control, but when the stars align you can’t help but think of God saying “Hey!” I don’t believe in coincidences. I believe in the power and magic of the Holy Spirit.

So, I had some wonderful ideas swirling around in that head of mine regarding a baptism invitation and all of the symbols I wanted to include: Lydia’s name in the bible context (the book of Acts), the color purple, a tribute to Nana, our baby pictures (3 generations) and my Faith. I had so many ideas I had to get them down on paper, so I did. Then I sought out someone with the ability to help me put it all together into an amazing presentation.

From the advice of my sister-in-law, I looked on Etsy.com for some templates of the type of invitation I wanted, which was a 5x5 Tri-fold design. I ended up finding someone who fit perfectly in what I needed at that exact moment (Thank You, God). Not only would this person custom make and create my invitation from nothing but my vision and the size & style of the folded card, but she ended up relating to me on a personal level in so many ways.

Through our online conversations and sharing bits and pieces of my own story, I had learned she too lost a parent as a young woman just starting to have her babies. She was also a woman of faith. Christy and I clicked, and she worked with me one-on-one starting simply with the color & pattern choice. Then we moved on to the main context, font, symbols, layout, photos, etc. Since I started designing so early, it was great to focus on one small thing at a time until we found what we wanted. I’m super proud of the way the invitation ended up in the end. I do not usually consider myself to have a creative flair, but I think I superseded any expectation I would have of myself in the design of this card. Lydia’s baptism meant so much more to me than anything I can even describe.

When I thought maybe I was focusing the day too much on my Mom’s memory and not Lydia, a close friend of mine pointed out to me to consider how else will I ever incorporate my Mom into my daughter’s life going forward? Of course Lydia will know of her Nana and I will share stories with her and photographs, but to have her Nana be part of a special milestone in her life, this was it. And, I’m so happy I did it this way.

Once the invite was complete, since we had spent so much time communicating, the designer, Christy, and I didn’t want to say “Good-bye”, so we became friends on Facebook. Now we can share updates and inspirational messages and things along the way throughout our journey in life. For reasons such as these, facebook or any social media can be a great tool. As with anything, if you use the tools correctly, they can bring great joy.

Aside from the gorgeous invitation, my sister-in-law helped put together a background image of Lydia and Nana looking upon her, to be displayed on the screens at the Church during the time of the baptism. It was the perfect final touch to complete the day.

Additionally there were a few other details special to me. Lydia wore my baptismal sundress even though we were in the middle of winter (I was baptized in August); but I had lace trimmed white leggings and a long sleeve white onesie underneath the dress. The dress was hand-made by Elizabeth Shank’s Mommy, the girl whom I was named after. They were special friends of my Mom’s growing up. Lydia also had white socks with a small star embellishment on it for the epiphany star, and really fancy sequined shoes from Nanny Walker. My Dad also ordered a Cake designed after the one my Mom made for me at my Baptism in 1979.

My Dad wrote this special prayer for the luncheon following the baptismal service:

Lydia’s Baptism Prayer, by Poppy

Lydia is named after a woman of faith in the book of Acts and Alexis, her Nana in heaven, whose name means defender of man.

With those meanings in mind, let us offer a prayer of thanksgiving…

Lord God, gracious heavenly father, we give you thanks for the gift of Lydia Alexis Walker on this day of her baptism. May she grow up strong in the lord under the watchful care and Christian example of her loving parents, David & Elizabeth and Godparents, Janet, Becky, and Mike. As her faith grows, through the power of the Holy Spirit, we pray she will come to know Jesus as her personal Lord and Savior and be a witness to the meaning of her names.

As we continue our celebration, we give you thanks for this food. Let it nourish our bodies and remind us of the feast that all believers look forward to in paradise with you.

In Jesus Holy Name we pray, Amen.

This was such a special day in my daughter’s and our family’s life.

Dear Mom,

You knew me the best, as a woman, and just starting out as a Mom. I sure miss having you in my corner… someone who gets me and gets the things that set me off, and always understood some things that may be simple to some, can be major triumphs to me. I miss celebrating that with you! I miss being able to celebrate life with you, too…the good & the bad, the accomplishments & the even the fall-outs.

I’m sitting here in between tears & smiles just trying to finish this blog (you don’t want to know how long I’ve been writing this). Almost every time I think I’m settled for a little bit of time something needs to be done, or someone needs me. And, then I’m off in a whirlwind of what sometimes feels like never ending tasks. And then the forgotten thoughts in my mind start to resurface, such as “oooh! That coupon expires soon!”, “Hmmm, maybe we can run those errands there and the other errands somewhere else”… It just never ends and in the midst of my crazy stay-at-home Mom life I’m thinking about you on the hour.

I’m wondering what it was like when you were doing this very thing when I was little. I’m wishing I could talk to you on a more motherly level. I feel like I barely had the chance on this earth and in this lifetime to talk “Mom” stuff with you. I think we were a lot alike in many ways and this is where I could really use your humor & advice, your laughter & encouragement. I know you are with us, just in a different way, but it’s still so hard for me since I’m not just a soul – I still have an earthly body & mind so my comprehension is nothing like yours is now. Sometimes I feel like I don’t have anyone who truly gets me and what I go through when I’m struggling or sad, and that makes me feel alone a lot. I wish I had a good reason to pick up the phone in the middle of the day again. Instead I feel like a bottle of soda that occasionally gets opened accidentally, but only after it gets shaken too many times. No one enjoys that, right?

Anyways, during Holy Week & Easter I think of you a lot. I remember all the ways you made Easter special for the family growing up. I’m doing little things with Joshua that are new to him, but traditional for me. He really enjoyed dying Easter eggs tonight for the first time. I remember that Easter Sunday, 2012 was the last day and part of the night Easter Monday that you spent in your house… but, I also remember you were feeling so bad you couldn’t even walk outside to enjoy all the children doing the Easter egg hunt. That makes me sad and I know you don’t want me to remember that, but I remember all of it.

Dad continues onward with the Easter egg hunt and all the goodies. He had me help with the Easter baskets last year as I always did for you, but this year he’s got it all taken care of on his own. He’s doing such a great job keeping up with all the holidays, celebrations, and special events in his own special & unique way. It’s very sweet and I know you are giving him many pats on the back along the way.

Mother’s Day is drawing near and my daughter is blossoming and I am missing you so very much in all of it. I’m not sure I will ever get over having to live this part of my life without you. I try not to weigh my blogs down with feeling sad a lot, but it’s true and it’s real and it’s there front and center. I don’t talk about it aloud very often, so I talk about it here and it helps me. And of course you know I’m still happy too. I’m immensely happy all at the same time. That’s my crazy life. I just truly miss laughing with you and having you make light of a stressful situation when I need it the most. I need that a lot with J & L!

As always, I know you are forever listening. I love you. Happy Easter, Mom

“The Sun will rise to better days…” –A Great Big World.

Dear God,

As I reflect on Holy Week and all that Jesus has done for us and given to us, I thank you for giving us the gift of eternal life and the promise of forever in your Kingdom, in your presence. Please lighten my sad heart some and help me to find joy in many things to come and help me to bring love and encouragement to others who are struggling, especially those I love so much. I need a little patience too ;)

Amen.